such a change

well it appears that it has been a very, very long time since i have written a blog but i felt the need to write something.

since the last time i have written, i have broken up with a great lady and will be living with my mother pretty soon. i don't think it will be a great time living with her but what else can i do? no one wants to rent to me unfortunately and the landlord is counting down the days until he can get us out of the apartment. i have always been the positive one when it comes to negative situations but this time around, i am not feeling to good about things.

i want to believe that everything will turn out alright. i will make some calls and people will flock to have me live in their unit. so far, that is the farthest from the truth. while living with my mother will afford me the chance to save up money and focus on finding the right apartment, i will have to deal with her everyday. i did that for 18 years and i am not too fond of doing it for another couple of months. but what else is there to do right now? i see plenty of apartments that offer "no security deposit" which is what i really need since i don't have that kind of money. unfortunately, no security deposit usually means no security in who you are living around or what you are living in.

i still have another week (if i beg my landlord) to decide on a place to live but in the end, i feel like it really will not make much of a difference. time to make a decision, a good decision. but now a days, what is the right decision?